i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Randomize
