She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
Randomize
