This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
I got inside last night via doggy door
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Randomize
