On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
Randomize
