he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize
