used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
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