Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
Is a Chipotle burrito an acceptable "sorry I ran over your cat" gift?
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Randomize
