I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
Randomize