hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
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