Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
Randomize