these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
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