Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize
