told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
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