oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
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