curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
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