batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
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