i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
Even the bartender felt bad for me
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
I received a text promising me sex if I drove to Memphis this weekend. Too bad for my penis that we're watching zombie movies and playing cards.
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
why does every cop we meet know your name?
Randomize