Where is the hickey?
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
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