I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
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