brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Randomize
