real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
I thought turtle was a code word for weed until he pulled out a baby turtle from his pocket and said "$20 for a turtle"
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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