Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
This dudes playing guitar and singing outside our window and he's like "ravioli is beterrrrrrr than tortelliniIii cause tortelliniiii is shaped like fucking ears"
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
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