Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
I shit you not. I was sitting on Brian's balcony...still drunk from the night before, and a hummingbird flew onto the patio, stared me right in the face and flew away. I feel like it was God's way of telling me, "Stop drinking."
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
Randomize
