I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
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