Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
Randomize