You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
There's always time for handjobs
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
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