I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
Randomize
