I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
Randomize
