We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
Randomize
