I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
Randomize
