BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
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