Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
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