Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
Randomize
