O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
I wish i was in the wii world.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
So I was at my annual OBGYN appointment and when she saw the bruises on the inside of my thigh she asked if I had been horse back riding...I think my burst of laughter then awkward silence answered the question for me.
Randomize
