All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
She's like a pop up book from hell.
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
Randomize