u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Randomize
