it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
The owner of this phone is no longer accepting texts from liars, assholes or married men. You figure out which one applies.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
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