Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
