Plan B is the new Plan A
How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
Randomize