i just shit an entire soup salad and breadsticks from the olive garden... bud light wins again.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
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