is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
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