i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
Can you come over?
Sex??
Sure but there’s also a squirrel in my garage I need you to take care of.
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