This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
fuck your aforementioned shoe
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize
