Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
