hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
he fucked my hip out of place.
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
Randomize
