He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
You should frame my arrest warrant.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
Randomize
