is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
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