idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
Jelly. This is your "are you still alive" text. Any response will do.
Hey I found a cat!
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize
