Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize