fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
Hello Officers/Paramedics, judging by last night, my friend is dead. The money in his pockets is mine, he owed me. Please send me directions to whichever morgue/strip club for pick up.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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