3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
Randomize
